I Survived :-)

I had my IUD insertion done yesterday while being put to sleep and it was amazing. Amazing cause I don't remember a thing! When I got to the hospital everything went too fast that Naty didn't even make it till after the procedure was done. The nurse came and gave me a shot of something to make me happy and boy did it! So on my way to the OR I seen Dr. Tsai and he hangs over me and says, "you wanna see the IUD?" and I say yeah, so he shows me and all I can see is the words MIRENA!!!!! NOOOOOOOO In my head for a quick second I think...hmmmm...maybe he's just showing me that cause it's a sample or something well...Thank God I say, "is that the one you're inserting in me?" and he says, "Yeah". I started getting really out of it and I say, "that's not the one I wanted!" This is the first time I was disappointed with him cause he says, "wait! we've talked about this on several occasions and this is the one you said you wanted," then he askes the nurse, "wait did you give her the medication already?" and he's like DAMMIT! I can see it all over his face. He was like super annoyed and wanted to jump on me, I just didn't say anything cause I didn't really have the strength and then he says, "oh wait! yeah you're right Marlene you did want the Paragard, Ok I'll put that" and it was OVER!!! I woke up who knows how long after with a pain in my throat. I wanted to cough it out so bad and I was talking out of my ass about school and how I did this so I can finish and if I wanted kids later I can always get it out! OMG! poor nurse was prob. like, STFU already! hah! after the medication started wearing off I started thinking to myself, WHAT AN IDIOT! hahahahaha I can't believe I shared my whole life with these people that could prob. care less! hahahaha So after I was very aware I seen my nurse sitting right next to me and she was soooooooooooo cool. We hit it off imediately and we were messing around and laughing at everything and anything. Then when Naty walked in, it was over! they hit it off and were talking about the history of the hospital and other stuff. She told me if I hit it big in Vegas to remember her. So Naty wheels me out and I'm still feeling LOOPY but super hungry. So we hit up Sizzler and eat like beasts kings, it was soooooo YUMMY. We ate and had a good conversation since we didn't have kids around (oh BTW, the kids were with my MIL!) and right after we went to my catechism class and I felt like passing out in there. I kept strong and got through it and then we picked up the kids and came home.
I've been having slight bleeding but nothing bad and hardly any pain so I'm very happy. Nurse said do nothing for 2 days and no sex for a week, I had to be dilated so thats why. The instrument they use usually can open you up but I didn't budge so thats why the restrictions. But everything is fine and I pray it doesn't give me problems!

Thank You Bumbo!

I really wanted a Bumbo for Nate b/c I heard you can get a lot more done while they watch you. Well, "they" were all right! I put him on the countertop while washing dishes, then I sat him in the bathroom next to me while I cleaned it, then I sat him on the Laund. Room countertop while I folded clothes. He just stared at me the whole time and was getting tired. I think he's using alot more muscles trying to stay up so it's a workout for him cause when I took him out he was yawning and scratching his eyes. I fed him and he's totally knocked out right now. I can't wait till I can feed him in it, LOL.

One more thing, if you really want one look on craigslist first. I got a used one with a tray that sells for $50 at target and got this one for $20 and it was practically brand new. I just went over it with lysol bacterial wipes and then a wash rag.

3 Month Postpartum (all about ME!)

Ok, I thought I'd be selfish for a bit and talk about myself :-)

It's been 3 months since having the little turkey and I feel great. I think alot of it has to do with my weight loss. I'm now down.......35 lbs. from my highest weight (before I gave birth) and that puts me at about 21 lbs. less than I was Pre-pregnancy. In the beginning I wasn't eating much, mostly cause I was too busy and I had no appetite. Then I got stuck at the same weight for a long time and decided to do something about it and started the Weight Watcher's Breastfeeding Program. I would get 25 points if I wasn't BF-ing but since I am I get 35 pts. It seems like a lot BUT I'm still hungry cause Nate takes alot from me. I read somewhere that for each ounce you make you burn 20 calories and I think he's eating about 4 ounces every 2-3 hours right now.

As for my surgery I feel completely healed but know in reality that I'm not and should still take it easy. Dr. Tsai couldn't believe how great I healed on the outside and said he couldn't even see a scar. I don't think I ever posted about my incision on here but it was clear across my bottom stomach, from one end to the next, it was awful. One day after coming home from the hospital I decided to look down there and to my great surprise I had staples from one end to the other, I was horrified and I think I even cried. I was horrified by my black stomach, it was so bruised that it looked DEAD. I remember Dr. Tsai telling me that I had alot of bruising but didn't think it was this bad. He said it was from the D&C cause the doctor had to push on my stomach to get everything out...OUCH (thank God they put me to sleep!). I don't remember the exact number but Naty counted about 17 staples but when I got them out the nurse said I had about 20! that's alot.

When I got home from the hospital I didn't relax like I should have. I was giving others advice about not doing too much and how they shouldn't worry about house duties.......but I didn't take my own advice, once again. I really thought I would be able to control myself and rest but it was so hard. I was going daily to Naty's parents new house and hauling Nathaniel back and forth. I was up and down and even went shopping the day after I got home from the hospital. I could NOT stay still. I'm not a sitting around type person, I get too antsy and need to do something. I did take medicine a little longer than my previous c-sections but that was expected with a bigger incision that I didn't know about.

So now, 3 months later, I feel amazing and blame it all on weight loss. I honestly believe that if I didn't lose this much weight I would be miserable still. I'd probably be needing the occasional motrin for my back or stomach (scar tissue) but I don't feel any of that.

Again, I don't think I mentioned it here but I tried getting an IUD inserted when I went for my 6 week PP appt. and it was unsuccessful. It was way too painful and my doctor called off the procedure after I was shaking and crying from the pain. He said he'd surgically insert it if I wanted so I said YES and I have a surgery date for Nov. 17th. Please say a little prayer for me since I'll be put under, it's nothing major but the being put to sleep part is scary. Which brings me to another thing I forgot to mention, after talking with Dr. Tsai he said my uterus is healthy enough to carry another baby and said I can do that if I wanted in the future. Who knows?!? I want another baby, I want TONS but I've got to focus on the ones we have now. They deserve all of our attention and sometimes it's hard to give it to them 3 so maybe in the future if we get brave enough we might have 1 more and that will be it. I always wanted 4 children but Naty said he's happy already. I'm not 100% on what our decision is but only time will tell.

You know what's the strangest thing?!?!? I don't remember being pregnant w/Nate. I remember it wasn't bad till the last weeks. It's so weird that it just happened and it's completely out of my head already. I think a week after I had him I felt this way. I don't remember my belly, the moving, anything. I know I had a big belly and the baby moved but I just don't remember my belly popping out while I sat around or walked around, its really weird. I even went back in my posts to read and it made me feel alot better cause I hate not remembering. I'm so glad I did this blog, I really need to save it somewhere so I never lose this. It's the only way I can go back and remember...ok I'm getting choked up. I better stop.


My Mom and Nathaniel

3 Months :)

Little Nate is growing so fast, I think he's skipping 3-6 month clothes and heading straight for the 6-9 monthers. He's a smart lil cookie and knows what he wants and when he doesn't get it, he makes sure he's heard when he's screaming his head off! He's my high maintenance little boy, Bubbs and Audrey were never this needy and I think it has alot to do with BF-ing. Naty says he just wants to be next to his milk jugs.

At three months you or (you're):
1) still being BF'd.
2) eating on demand
3) taking lil cat naps throughout the day.
4) sleeping at 8pm, wake at 3am to eat go back to sleep and up at 7am.
5) love your bro and sis and look for them.
6) know and love your daddy.
7) starting to giggle a little.
8) eat and play with your hands (they stink all the time too!).
9) wearing a size 3-6 months but will soon grow out of those.
10) wearing a size 2 diaper and it's a lil big.
11) smiling tons!
12) liking your swing a lot more.
13) loving your vibrating rocker chair (for short 20 mins).
14) still taking baths in the BR sink.
15) still sleeping with mama and occasionally in your bassinet.
16) still my lil fart machine :-)

2.5 Month Appt.

My baby boy is thriving off his mama and that makes me so happy! he's not as big as Bubbs was at this stage but he's still a chunker. At 11 weeks, he weighed in at 12 lbs. 12 oz. and was 24 inches long. Which puts him below average for weight and slightly above average for length.

He's still BF and on occasion he'll get a bottle of formula, mostly when I leave him with Naty (which is rare!) Cause I don't want to hassle him with warming up my BM cause I'm actually afraid of him not getting the temp. right so I don't even worry myself about it. He's been fine with times I've given him formula but no matter what I still need to pump so it's still like he nursed and then I get to save that milk I took out to freeze!

I'm going back to school in January and I'll have to leave BM with my MIL, Nate will be 6 months then so he won't be drinking so many bottles and eating baby food then. I will continue to pump when I get a chance in between classes in my car. I will be needing costco pack batteries to get me through the semester. I don't mind doing this for my chubster.

Overall, life has been a little difficult, we have good and bad days and good days are when he naps and bad days are when he cries and wants me to hold him all day. Other than that we're so in love!

2 Months!

Happy 2 months Nathaniel!

He's been such a joy to our lives and makes life so enjoyable. The kids are always loving on him and wanting to hold him, they thank me all time for having him. It is especially good to have Nathaniel during this difficult time in our lives, when I'm alone without the older kids I have Nathaniel to hold and cry with, I hug him and feel loads better. We lost Boris (our dog) over the weekend and could not find him and unfort. Audrey was the one that found him and thought he was asleep. Poor Audrey, I feel awful about that and feel awful for Boris. We don't know what happened to him but he hid behind the haystacks and died there. There's alot more to the story but I hate reliving it over and over again, I just hope he didn't suffer.

As for Nathaniel, he's getting really big. He has his 2 month appt. tomorrow so I will update again. I'm thinking he weighs a good 12 lbs. He was at 10 lbs. last time. He's a good eater and a good sleeper. Here's a few things he's doing now:

At 2 months old YOU:
1) Smile and Coo at us!
2) love car rides
3) love to take naps on my chest
4) are in a size 2 diaper
5) are wearing 0-3 months clothes but growing out of them
6) are exclusively breastfed! thank you Jesus
7) eat on demand
8) are starting to like your swing a little more
9) are starting to like baths and haven't been crying like you used to
10) don't really like your diaper changed
11) love your new rocker chair
12) you hit the toys in front of you
13) fall sleep around 9-10pm and wake once to feed at around 3:30-4:30am
14) start your days at 7am
15) take little cat naps throughout the day
16) love your sister (I think it's her mouse-y voice)
17) still LOVE to FART!

It's finally paying off!

All of my pumping is finally paying off!
I just hit the 22 ounce mark a couple of days ago so I thought it could be time now to feed him directly off the boob and guess what!?!?! he finally got full on nursing! It all happened cause I had no choice but to nurse him when I forgot to bring a bottle for him to mass this morning. He was fine in mass but after we went and bought breakfast and went to the park to eat and play. Well Nate got hungry so I took him to the car to nurse and he was full and happy, it was amazing! Then from there I said to myself, "I can do this, I'm gonna try to nurse him all day" and it went well! I know a baby can suck out more than any pump so thats why I was fine with hitting the 22 ounce mark and nursing him. I'm not sure how much more they can suck out but I'm hoping its at least a half ounce more cause I'm averaging 2.75 ounces every 3 hours when pumping and he eats 3 ounces at each feeding. Now I've gotta work on making more to freeze and store for the future.
Also, Naty knows how much my BM means to me and this morning I woke up so engorged cause I went about 10 hours without pumping last night cause I felt awful yesterday. Because of that, I was able to pump out 8 ounces this morning, well....I left my BM on the counter and totally forgot about it so I had to throw it out and it was upsetting. Naty seen me throwing it out and said, "aaawww babe I'm sorry," that made me feel loads better cause he felt sympathy for me and knows what it means to me. It also shows how important the BM is to him.
Tomorrow Nathaniel will be 8 weeks but not considered 2 months till saturday on the third. We're having alot of ups and downs with him these past 8 weeks. I seems that every time the weekend rolls around he doesn't feel well. He's having stomach and crying issues. He started off fussy friday and was a little worse on saturday and today he slept most of the day. I took advantage and slept with him for 5 hours. I know I went 2 hours passed his feeding time BUT I didn't care, I wanted him to rest cause if he wasn't hurting, I was happy! When I decided to wake up and feed him, he did NOT want to wake up, he was so tired, poor little guy. He's wide eyed right now with Naty on the couch so we'll see if he sleeps again. I love that little guy and it breaks my heart when he cries, I hope this passes soon.
As for the big kids they're totally in love with him and the crying doesn't phase them. They don't get upset or tell me to shut him up (like I would tell my mom about my sister! LOL) they're always concerned and LOVE him to pieces.

Still Pumping away...

Pumping still sucks (literally, LOL) but I'm still doing it and my supply is steadily growing. I'm doing everything possible to increase my supply and as hard as it is I think of the benefits and thats what keeps me going. Nate can easily nurse now with NO problem but the problem now is my supply. He eats about 24oz. a day and I make about 13oz. a day, so I'm still behind and as he grows he'll be needing more and I pray my supply eventually catches up to him.

I started with 0.5oz of BM mixed with 2.5oz of Formula and now I'm up to 2oz. of BM mixed with 1oz. of formula on MOST feedings and at night and early morning he gets 3oz. of full formula to be able to freeze some of my milk. I freeze one 4oz. serving of BM a day and so far I have 11 bags of 4oz. in the freezer. That supply is for the future, when I eventually decide to stop pumping (hoping to reach 6 months) or when Naty decides to take me somewhere ;-)

I really thought pumping would make all my worries and stress go away but it's kind of added to it. But I will NOT give up, this is for Nate and as time goes by, it gets a little easier. Last night was one of the most satisfying times of this whole breastfeeding/pumping/formula feeding frenzy when Nate woke up hungry (he's been sleeping through the night and last night he woke up hungry) and I was able to BF him and he was satisfied, I was nearly in tears. I could not believe that I satisfied him to the point that he was full and satisfied, that would be my wish to ONLY BF but hopefully one day. Oh and then I realized...LOL...that I was only able to do that because I didn't do my late pump and I was full from that. But now that I know how it feels to ONLY BF and satisfy your baby I want it much more. Someday :-)

One Month Old!

My little boy is one month old today!
We had a photo session (LOL) this morning and he was loving it. It was the first time in his crib too.
At one month, YOU:
1) lift your head at any chance you get to look all around the room.
2) love your mama and only want me! When other people hold you, you start to cry and once I get you you're ok :-)
3) drink 3oz of milk right now, 1.5oz of formula and 1.5oz of my milk.
4) you're growing out of your newborn clothes and fitting in 0-3 months with room to grow.
5) had a doctor's appointment about a week ago and you were weighing 10lbs. 1oz. I'm pretty sure you've gained more since then.
6) are 21 inches long.
7) sleep with your mama every night and Daddy sleeps in Audrey's room, LOL.
8) wear a size 1 diaper.
9) nurse on occasion (when I'm not pumping!) and love to be close to your mama.
10) stopped waking up in the night at 2.5 weeks, you sleep till around 5:30-7am every morning.
11) really don't like the swing which hurts my feelings cause it was so expensive!
12) love the bouncy seat for a short nap but I probably put you in it about 2 times a day.
13) LOVE car rides! you usually fall asleep or sit in there quietly while we get to grandma's house.
14) go to grandma and grandpa's new house everyday, you usually sleep the whole time.
15) smile alot more now and love when we talk to you.
16) fart alot! always farting, which is good for you but not for us! ;-)

Fussy Boy

This boy just wants his mama! (picture above)this is what happens when I put him down. I usually give in with the first peep (sucker) and have him on me till he's in a deep sleep then I get a "small break" to cook and clean. It's funny cause the other day I attempted to make dinner and it took me 2 days to make it! hahahaha I have so much to do that by the time I get to dinner its late and naty is almost home and besides, now that his parents are close by we've been eating there (BBQ). They tell me not to cook and to go over and eat with them, no need to ask me twice. But then I thought, its time, time to make my own dinner. I've been doing it all but it seems dinner is what I'm still struggling with. But anyway, thats life with 3 kids!